About the Author

Honey's main interests are online dating, long distance dating, and long term relationships. She met her boyfriend on MySpace and they have been exclusive since their first date over three years ago. Currently they live in Tempe, Arizona. Honey graduated with her PhD in Composition and Rhetoric in May 2009. You can contact Honey via email here or online here.

Tax Returns: Complete and Total Satisfaction

Oh, dudes, the beauty of unemployment.  Since I went over 3 months without a job last summer (and since I hired an accountant to do my taxes this year) I am getting back about $2500 on my federal and (for the first time!) state income taxes.


What are my plans for the moolah, you ask?  Well, here’s the breakdown:

  1. Cut, color, highlight, and some fancy new hair product (plus tip): $315.54.  And may I add, I feel human again. Thank gawd – my last cut and color was in August, when I started my new job, and not only was the color growing out absolutely grotesquely, all my gray was showing.  Ewww.  Now not only is my hair shiny, pretty, and full of life, it’s all blown out straight for our anniversary dinner tomorrow night.  Hooray!
  2. Replenishing my stock of previous fancy hair product: $150.  My hair’s curly and needs a LOT of TLC out here in the desert.  This will buy me my favorite conditioner ($68 for 8 ounces, Kerastase rocks!) but also some of the leave-in conditioner that I like, the Warren Tricomi hair gum, and my favorite “curls rock!” spray.
  3. Monster payment to my credit card: $850 (thus bringing my total credit card debt under $6K – I’ve wiped out over 2/3 of it in just under a year since starting my new job).  Again, hooray!
  4. Gambling/cab/alcohol/assorted having-fun money for Vegas Memorial Weekend Trip Sextacular: $600.  We already pre-paid for our plane ticket, hotel, show, and all-venue club pass, so this is pretty much just incidentals.
  5. And this leaves me just under $600 for the purchase of new office-appropriate attire.  I learned upon getting a job where I must wear such garb everyday but Friday (when an ASU t-shirt earns me the right to wear jeans) that I don’t have a heck of a lot of it, and I’m sick to death of everything that I own.  I have as many pairs of dress pants as there are workdays in the week, and let me tell you, this is not a recipe for girly-happiness.  There’s an outlet mall and a SteinMart near my cute new place, so the goal is 2 pairs of dress pants (1 brown, 1 navy blue), 5 shirts that are both office- and going-out-for-drinks appropriate, 1 pair of new walking sandals, 1 pair of cute/comfy shoes for officewear, and however many accessories I can squeeze out of that much money.  Since I’m shopping at clearance/discount-friendly places, I am pretty confident I can stay within this budget (if I stay at $50 per item then I should be able to get everything on the list and some cute accessories, too).

Part of me feels like I should save some of it, but

  1. I got word last week that my contract for next year is renewed and no furlough next year, so I’m feeling secure in my job and will soon have a +10% jump in my paycheck (perhaps they gave us furlough so that we would feel like we were getting raises at the end of the FY even though we’re actually not), and
  2. I have $4500 in savings right now and while I’d rather have at least 3 months of expenses in the bank rather than two and a quarter…I’m thinking that is enough for most non-job-loss type emergencies.

Unfortunately, the awesome tax bracket I ended up in as a result of my unemployment is (hopefully) a one-time thing, although I suspect that this year’s furlough will lead me to get something next year, even if it’s not two and a half grand.  However, I have promised the BF that I will play craps in Vegas and, if craps is kind to me, I will give blackjack another try (I gave that up after I lost $60 in a minute and a half…at least slot machines tease it out of you over the course of a few hours).  If Vegas overall is kind to me, then I will probably make another monster credit card payment when I get back…we’ll have to see.

How did your taxes go?

If this post made you insanely jealous of Honey’s unemployment despite the fact that at the time she had a near-complete hysterical meltdown on a daily basis and made her BF’s life miserable…you might also enjoy:

  • http://www.vcarded.com The Virgin

    My taxes? After paying the accountant, just enough to afford a popcorn at the movie theater. But THAT is some expensive popcorn.

  • http://www.thedateabledork.com The Dateable Dork

    Wow, congrats! That’s one hell of a chunk of cash, and I’m impressed that you’re putting it to such good use, while still saving a bit for fun stuff. Oh, and the hair… getting your hair done is such an great indulgence… reminds me that I need to make an appointment. : )

  • Me Thinks

    I forgot what it is like to be kid-less. Let’s just say I used mine for a big downpayment on a new car AND a chunk of my bathroom remodel. See, kids aren’t so bad now then, are they??? *wink*

    Congrats on the windfall! So great to be able to do some nice things for yourself. Damn girl, you are so practical even when splurging! Good for you being true to yourself. These last few years I was so geeked out over paying down my credit card debt too, it is like porn for people like us. Gives new meaning to “money shot”. Hee!

  • http://20-forty.com lisaq

    Gotta love a windfall! Most of mine went into things for my house and it’s wonderful sitting in my newly renovated living room enjoying it every day. Just got an unexpected insurance refund check too and am socking that away for our Vegas trip in October. Damn I love found money! hehe…

    lisaq´s last blog post…Redefining The Cougar Or Boring America to Tears?

  • http://casualencounters.com/blog/ Janak

    Having $4500 saved and credit card debt “under $6k” makes zero sense. Put your savings on your credit card.

    Janak´s last blog post…A perfect fake PENISTRON

  • http://honeyandlance.com Honey

    I have thought about this and won’t do it for two reasons:

    1) the idea of having no savings makes me very uncomfortable, especially in this economy. So it’s an emotional cushion as well as a financial one.

    2) My student loan repayment starts next month, and so even if I paid off my credit cards, my monthly payments will be such that I will NEVER EVER be able to save up $4500 again. I prefer to build the cushion I have however slowly rather than start from scratch, which will take YEARS.

    I read personal finance books and blogs avidly, so I’m comfortable with my decision.

  • http://www.used-tire.net used tires

    Well.. you are very lucky! My taxes didn’t go so well… no returns for me… I have to pay, but here’s the catch… I am in debt, so.. it kinda of sucks that I have to pay as much as I do. Actually taxes give me a headache.

    Till then,


  • http://simonandcole.com Simon

    I think I got 600 bucks, that I didn’t know about because I did my taxes online when I was drunk, forgot about it, then realized it was after the day, freaked, and remembered what I did. My plane ticket back to the U.S. was 420. I’ll get hammered in the airport and call it a day.

    Simon´s last blog post…Sumpin’ New by Simon