By Honey on Jun 2, 2009 in Featured, Relationships | comments(13)
So I received an e-mail over the weekend from a friend of mine from college, saying that he’d awoken in the night after a nostalgic and somewhat erotic dream about me.
I met this fellow, call him Dan, freshmen year of college – we were in the same English class. I had a huge crush on him and used to walk him to his next class since I didn’t have one immediately after our English class. Later he joined a fraternity and so we had lots of mutual friends and saw each other quite often, though rarely because we had made specific plans to hang out (though sometimes we did). Continued
By Honey on Jun 6, 2008 in Dating | comments(17)
As Lance says here, the perfect date is indeed a blog-worthy subject. I’ve been on many first dates myself (in fact, that was practically all I used to go on) and while I have to agree with Dadshouse that most online daters aren’t terribly original when it comes to first dates, I thought I’d put in my two cents as part of my entry for his First-Date Contest.
I have to agree with Lance that what makes a first date stand out isn’t typically the venue, it’s something electrifying about the company that you’re with. However, it’s hard to be electrified if you don’t craft the scenario at least a little bit to your liking. The anticipation begins before the date. Obviously my best first date in theory was with the BF, since it led to our fantastic relationship. And there were good things and bad things about it–so here I’ll list the good things and the bad, thereby serving as an object lesson in what to do and what not to do, simultaneously. Continued
By Honey on May 29, 2008 in Dating | comments(6)
Fact: you have friends–which means that the person you’re dating needs to see you interact with those friends. Fact: you also have to charm the friends of the person you’re dating. PLUS, you’ve gotta be able to interact with colleagues, bosses, underlings, clients, because sometimes you have to bring your date along to work events (or you’re invited to be a date to someone else’s work event). Conclusion: if you can’t talk to a wide variety of people about a wide variety of subjects, you are going to look like a total douchebag.
Whoa! I know what you’re thinking–a lot of pressure! But it doesn’t have to be. With a little legwork, you can be prepared for almost any conversational circumstance. Lance gives some suggestions on being a conversational whiz here. He’s mostly talking about how to be witty on a date. My post focuses on topics you can use when conversing with people you don’t know well–whether that’s a date you met online, someone you’re picking up at a club, or a horrible work cocktail party or company picnic.
Here are some subjects near and dear to my own heart that almost anyone can learn about with a minimum of effort: Continued
By Lance on May 29, 2008 in Dating, Featured | comments(12)
Okay dudes, I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the difference between good dates and bad dates. A lot of it comes down to having good conversational skills…all the advice out there says that exchanging information and interviewing each other is LAME, which is correct. “What’s your job? Where are you from? What’s your favorite color? What color are you panties?” Next! You want to find ways to connect with a person on a deeper level.
I’m a pretty kickass conversationalist–yeah, I said it–so I sat down and analyzed what I did. It boils down to being able to articulate well, developing multiple threads, and having great content (it’s kind of like blogging actually). I’m assuming you’re a good speaker and can maintain multiple threads, so what I want to do is analyze the content side of the equation. In my mind, having good content the key to excellent conversation. Basically, you want to have material that gets both parties engaged.
Here are 9 ways to pump up the content of your conversations:
By Honey on Mar 7, 2008 in Relationships | comments(3)
In days of yore, men and women used to fight over the TV remote. Actually, I remember the days before remotes. My dad and mom got to sit on the couch and my sister and I sat on the floor, and when my dad wanted the channel changed, we did it for him. I was convinced for a long time that was why people had children–they never had to get up off the couch.
In days of slightly less yore, men and women used to fight over the TV remote. Then the DVR came along and changed all that. It was no longer so necessary to fight over the remote at any given time, because you can record things and watch them later. Plus, if you watch them later then you don’t have to watch the commercials.
This means that if so you kind of get a power flip, and whoever has the least power has to watch their show live, commercials and all, while the other person’s show records.
I canceled my cable at my apartment in Flagstaff because I wasn’t watching it much when I was in town anyway, and so I could chip in for satellite at my BF’s (student loan repayments more than he bargained for so he’s a little short on cash and I figured I could help out). I told him this, and said that now that I was paying for half, I wanted half of the recordings (our DVR can only make 50 series recordings…sigh…).
Him: You already have half of the recordings.
Me: <raise eyebrow>
Him: Okay, let’s check.
He opens up the prioritizer.
Him: Oh, it looks like I have 35 out of 50 shows recording.
Me: And I have nothing in the top 10.
Him: Tell me how many shows you want me to delete.
Hm. I thought that I was going to have a deliciously long post for you with lots of advice about tact and compromise. Turns out, if you both have the same definition of compromise, sometimes no discussion is necessary. Though I did reprioritize his stuff and put some things into the top 10 without telling him!
By Honey on Feb 14, 2008 in Life | comments(0)
If, despite Lance’s good advice, you decide to spend Valentine’s day in, there’s a lot more you can do with your time than watch When Harry Met Sally or Sleepless in Seattle for the 500th time with a bottle of wine and a box of tissues. Here’s a list of three of my favorite relationship-oriented TV shows. This way you can pass judgment on people (always a good time) as well as learn something for your next relationship. Of course, I have to point out that if you add these to your TiVo list and GO OUT, then you can have some Valentines’ fun and have something to compare your experience with when you get home.
The Millionaire Matchmaker
Patti Stanger is a Jewish third-generation matchmaker who sets up successful millionaires with classy, marriage-minded ladies. The show is entirely worth it to watch her bluntly tell playboys with unrealistic priorities and gorgeous gold diggers exactly why they’re still single. The show airs Tuesday nights on Bravo, but there are reruns on all the time. I like to compare my analysis of the men and women to hers throughout the show. Her Bravo Website has, among other things, “Dating Commandments” for both men and women. Not all of these commandments apply to us mere mortals, as they are the rules of her club.