I remember one of the first standup comics I ever saw was George Carlin. I was with my parents watching HBO in our first house in Florida. I was probably 9 or 10. I distinctly remember his seven dirty words routine. Yes, my parents let me watch the whole thing, even though it’s distinctly R-rated material, but it may have had something to do with the fact that my dad was laughing his ass off the entire time. Rarely have I seen my dad laugh so hard. I believe his own humor was very much in the same vein as Carlin’s. I didn’t understand everything Carlin was talking about at the time (“Dad, what’s a twat?”), but I remember I was blown away by how raw and powerful Carlin was. This was an awakening for me.
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My roommate and I threw a party at our place on Saturday night. Party was a hit. We grilled homemade pizzas (have you ever done this?), which friggin rocked, and drank a bunch of booze. The popular drinks were mojitos and Vodka-tonics. Oh, I have to mention this. I found out the hard way that I’m allergic to apples by eating a Gala apple. I’ve eaten a million apples in my life and never had an allergic reaction, but this time I did. The reaction is that the inside of your mouth and throat swells up, and in fact my throat swolled up to the point I couldn’t swallow solids for like thirty minutes. I looked around on the ‘net for treatments for the apple allergy, but couldn’t find anything. So I pounded a Benadryl and a Claritan just to see if it would help. It didn’t, but the Benadryl did make me feel funny, and combined with the vodka-tonics I got drunk in like 3 seconds. It sucked.
So I’ve been reading a buttload of single parent blogs lately and got inspired to ask this question: Should single parents let their kids know they have sex? If so, to what degree would you discuss your sex life with your children, and at what age is this appropriate? Obviously, since I’m not a parent, I don’t have to worry about this any time soon, but I thought it was an interesting query. The REASON I thought it was interesting was because I struggle with how much to project myself as a sexual being to friends and family. I also think parental advice on sex is generally FUCKING TERRIBLE, and this is a problem. I know my parents didn’t teach me about the birds and bees and I had to learn via trial and error.
So I had my first travel date with Gina over the weekend. She flew into town and we drove out to Daytona Beach for a weekend of partying and fun.
Just to recap, I picked Gina up in a bar in another state about two months ago, took her home, and closed her. We spent the weekend hanging out and had a great time. Shortly thereafter I established a long distance fuck buddy (LDFB) relationship. Since we live in other states, this was the only option. Going through the memory banks I realized I’ve had several LDFBs, but this is the first one where I concretely established it from the get-go. She was all for it.
On Friday we hung out at the Tiki Bar all day and got hammered. Continued
Okay, this is a combo field report and weekly roundup. This post is a little late since I was doing Lance stuff over the weekend.
First off, I had to “next” Knockers, the 24-year-old hottie I made out with several weeks ago. What does nexting mean? Here it is. I met her and Fatty of Doom at Chillers on Saturday night. Knockers wasn’t giving me shit in the way of IOI’s and I was purposely giving her the cold vibe to see if she would respond. I had already come into the interaction with low expectations because of FOD, who had cockblocked me twice before. Anyway, we met at the bar at 10:00. At midnight they announced suddenly that they had to go home. This was the final straw for me, so I literally stood up, back turned, and walked out of the bar…no goodbye, no hug, nothing. I heard FOD say goodbye to my back but I didn’t respond. Sometimes it’s better to cut and run and this was one of those situations. These two girls were just too lame for me to hang out with. I hooked up with some friends after that and hung out until the wee hours.
Happy Father’s Day, punkz!
Have you seen this? Mayor Margarita Martinez of Escobedo, a small town in northern Mexico, is giving away free Viagra and condoms to elderly men on Father’s Day. About 100 lucky fellows qualified for the giveway. She may have gotten the idea here, when Chilean Mayor Gonzalo Navarette Munoz instituted a free Viagra program in the suburb of Lo Prado. Munoz is in the midst of a re-election campaign and it’s been suggested that the Viagra giveaway is a ploy to get him re-elected. Hey, sounds good to me. That guy would get my vote. There are some happy fathers (and mothers) in those towns.
(Time for a breather, pal. Don’t wanna have a heart attack under there.)