All Posts Tagged With: "goals"

We’re Taking Pictures Of Ourselves Having Sex!

In my life, I’ve noticed that my “favorite foods” are sort of temporary.  There will be something that I absolutely crave and feel that I could eat at every meal (and almost do, for awhile) to the exclusion of almost anything else.  I will be absolutely convinced that I could eat it every day for the rest of my life and never get sick of it.  (Usually these items are from Trader Joe’s, for those of you lucky enough to have one in your town…yum…).

I have found that the BF and I also do this with our sex life (though I usually do get sick of the food at some point and never want to eat it again…that has never happened with sex!).  We will find something that we haven’t done in awhile, or haven’t done before, and it will become the centerpiece of our sex life for a month or two before we become obsessed with something else and “retire” our obsession (though we still obviously bring it out to play every once in a while). Continued

Life Is What Happens

Hey, everyone!  Sorry I’ve been incommunicado for the last week or so.  Life’s been crazy busy, as it all too often is. Here’s a little taste of what I’ve been up to.

Update on My Happiness

I’ve been doing a lot better as far as my personal independence since my Philosophy of Happiness post.  I’ve gone out again with my sorority alum club and been to the gym almost every day.  Also, in a recent conversation, the BF admitted that he’d been at fault, too.  He’s really still in a lot of debt from grad school because his field doesn’t offer funding to grad students, and he also didn’t do a great job budgeting so there’s a credit card debt factor.  As a result, he can’t afford to do a lot of the things he considers fun, and he admitted that he’s been taking out the frustration about the results of his poor financial planning on me.  But I do have some news that is not only great for me, but which will also alleviate both our financial situations. Continued

People are Inherently Lazy: Or, Why We Over-Rank Ourselves

In this post on his blog, Evan Marc Katz asked his readers to rank themselves in four categories: Looks, Personality, Intelligence, and Career.  Both Lance and I couldn’t resist commenting, and Lance also blogged an excellent reaction here.  It is pretty evident from the comments to his blog as well as the original article on the Freakonomics bulletin here that most people have a tendency to seriously overestimate themselves.  EMK hypothesizes,

The good news is that having a combination of self-esteem and self-delusion seems to be exactly what allows us to function. How would we feel if we didn’t believe we’re above average in every single way?

Although that is insightful and seems at least partially true, I also can’t help but feel that there must be a little more to it.  In a comment on Lance’s blog about whether you can teach an old dog new tricks, I mention something that I always told my students:

People are inherently lazy. Therefore, to convince them to take action, you must convince them not that your position is morally superior, but that they have more to lose by doing nothing than they do by taking action.

The fabulous cheekie suggested that I write a post where I expand on that idea, so here we go.  Continued

I’m a 10 in Looks, Smarts, Personality, and Career

[youtube]http://youtube.com/watch?v=_0Q9iAcPjzc[/youtube]

(Watch the video above then read me)

My homeboy Evan Marc Katz wrote an interesting post where he ranks himself in the following categories: Looks, Intelligence, Personality, Career.

Continued

The Long Distance Fuck Buddy

Okay, so recently I met this great chick while traveling for work. I picked her up, closed her, and generally had a great time for a couple of days. Remember how I talked about having a plan with every potential partner you date or meet? You should form a good idea if the person is LTR material, one nighter, fuck buddy, or nothing, in which case you need an exit strategy.

This girl I’m talking about is super cool and I want to maintain some kind of relationship with her, but a long distance relationship is out of the question. So I set up what I call a long distance fuck buddy (LDFB) arrangement. Basically, what it boils down to is that we’ll meet on party trips or in other cities to have adventures together. I’ve had a couple of friends pull this off successfully, and the idea really crystallized after reading Brad P’s ebook where he described several similar type arrangements he maintained.

Continued

Philosophy of Happiness

I try to live my life by the idea that happiness is a decision you make, not something you wait to happen to you.  With that in mind, I’ve made all sorts of decisions that, apparently, are difficult for many people.  Moving across the country to get a PhD in something I’d basically never heard of.  Starting a relationship/sex blog.  Most recently, quitting my job as a teaching assistant at the U and moving to another city to live with my boyfriend–without even having a job.

My best friend often says that my ability to pursue the path I think is right for me regardless of whether it’s easy or not is one of the qualities she admires the most about me.  However, I have to admit that this move has been fucking tough. I could really relate when I read Holly Hoffman’s post on Introducing a New Person Into Your Life, but I couldn’t help but think–what about when you’re the new person?  Because although we’ve been together over two years, I haven’t been trying to incorporate my man into an existing routine.  I’ve completely changed everything about my life and have been trying to build a new routine–in some ways an easier thing, but in other ways much harder. Continued

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