All Posts Tagged With: "goals"

In my life, I’ve noticed that my “favorite foods” are sort of temporary.  There will be something that I absolutely crave and feel that I could eat at every meal (and almost do, for awhile) to the exclusion of almost anything else.  I will be absolutely convinced that I could eat it every day for the rest of my life and never get sick of it.  (Usually these items are from Trader Joe’s, for those of you lucky enough to have one in your town…yum…).

I have found that the BF and I also do this with our sex life (though I usually do get sick of the food at some point and never want to eat it again…that has never happened with sex!).  We will find something that we haven’t done in awhile, or haven’t done before, and it will become the centerpiece of our sex life for a month or two before we become obsessed with something else and “retire” our obsession (though we still obviously bring it out to play every once in a while). Continued

Hey, everyone!  Sorry I’ve been incommunicado for the last week or so.  Life’s been crazy busy, as it all too often is. Here’s a little taste of what I’ve been up to.

Update on My Happiness

I’ve been doing a lot better as far as my personal independence since my Philosophy of Happiness post.  I’ve gone out again with my sorority alum club and been to the gym almost every day.  Also, in a recent conversation, the BF admitted that he’d been at fault, too.  He’s really still in a lot of debt from grad school because his field doesn’t offer funding to grad students, and he also didn’t do a great job budgeting so there’s a credit card debt factor.  As a result, he can’t afford to do a lot of the things he considers fun, and he admitted that he’s been taking out the frustration about the results of his poor financial planning on me.  But I do have some news that is not only great for me, but which will also alleviate both our financial situations. Continued

In this post on his blog, Evan Marc Katz asked his readers to rank themselves in four categories: Looks, Personality, Intelligence, and Career.  Both Lance and I couldn’t resist commenting, and Lance also blogged an excellent reaction here.  It is pretty evident from the comments to his blog as well as the original article on the Freakonomics bulletin here that most people have a tendency to seriously overestimate themselves.  EMK hypothesizes,

The good news is that having a combination of self-esteem and self-delusion seems to be exactly what allows us to function. How would we feel if we didn’t believe we’re above average in every single way?

Although that is insightful and seems at least partially true, I also can’t help but feel that there must be a little more to it.  In a comment on Lance’s blog about whether you can teach an old dog new tricks, I mention something that I always told my students:

People are inherently lazy. Therefore, to convince them to take action, you must convince them not that your position is morally superior, but that they have more to lose by doing nothing than they do by taking action.

The fabulous cheekie suggested that I write a post where I expand on that idea, so here we go.  Continued

(Watch the video above then read me)

My homeboy Evan Marc Katz wrote an interesting post where he ranks himself in the following categories: Looks, Intelligence, Personality, Career.

Continued

Okay, so recently I met this great chick while traveling for work. I picked her up, closed her, and generally had a great time for a couple of days. Remember how I talked about having a plan with every potential partner you date or meet? You should form a good idea if the person is LTR material, one nighter, fuck buddy, or nothing, in which case you need an exit strategy.

This girl I’m talking about is super cool and I want to maintain some kind of relationship with her, but a long distance relationship is out of the question. So I set up what I call a long distance fuck buddy (LDFB) arrangement. Basically, what it boils down to is that we’ll meet on party trips or in other cities to have adventures together. I’ve had a couple of friends pull this off successfully, and the idea really crystallized after reading Brad P’s ebook where he described several similar type arrangements he maintained.

Continued

I try to live my life by the idea that happiness is a decision you make, not something you wait to happen to you.  With that in mind, I’ve made all sorts of decisions that, apparently, are difficult for many people.  Moving across the country to get a PhD in something I’d basically never heard of.  Starting a relationship/sex blog.  Most recently, quitting my job as a teaching assistant at the U and moving to another city to live with my boyfriend–without even having a job.

My best friend often says that my ability to pursue the path I think is right for me regardless of whether it’s easy or not is one of the qualities she admires the most about me.  However, I have to admit that this move has been fucking tough. I could really relate when I read Holly Hoffman’s post on Introducing a New Person Into Your Life, but I couldn’t help but think–what about when you’re the new person?  Because although we’ve been together over two years, I haven’t been trying to incorporate my man into an existing routine.  I’ve completely changed everything about my life and have been trying to build a new routine–in some ways an easier thing, but in other ways much harder. Continued

Happy Father’s Day, punkz!

Have you seen this? Mayor Margarita Martinez of Escobedo, a small town in northern Mexico, is giving away free Viagra and condoms to elderly men on Father’s Day. About 100 lucky fellows qualified for the giveway. She may have gotten the idea here, when Chilean Mayor Gonzalo Navarette Munoz instituted a free Viagra program in the suburb of Lo Prado. Munoz is in the midst of a re-election campaign and it’s been suggested that the Viagra giveaway is a ploy to get him re-elected. Hey, sounds good to me. That guy would get my vote. There are some happy fathers (and mothers) in those towns.

(Time for a breather, pal. Don’t wanna have a heart attack under there.)

I had this one amazing night over the weekend, probably the funnest night I’ve had all year. I’m going to write this one field report style, so it’ll be fast and furious with little embellishment. There’s some good tactics and a few new things I tried.

Continued

A friend of mine graduated last week, so one week after packing up and leaving Flagstaff “for good,” I drove back to attend a department picnic and to attend her graduation party.  Although she’d been planning this party for some time, attendance wasn’t what she was expecting, largely because so many other people were graduating that weekend everyone was committed to something-or-other.  As a result, while a few of my friends were there, her party mostly consisted of herself, her husband, her parents, and her in-laws.  This was fine with me because I get along great with people who are older than me–in fact, I generally prefer them to people my own age.

However, it got me to remembering when I met the BF’s parents, and when he met my dad (my mom passed away when I was 18).  In fact, it struck me that meeting the parents isn’t really any different (aside from the age difference) from meeting the other person’s friends.  The question becomes, how do I impress someone who has a vested interest in, and therefore a desire to protect, the other person–and who is more than willing to do that at my expense?

Continued

First of all, hi everybody! I moved in with the BF this past weekend and it’s been a flurry of activity, as I’m sure you can all imagine. Fortunately I hired movers to load and unload, and the BF drove the truck (I followed behind in the car so we wouldn’t have to tow anything), but there was more than enough packing, unpacking, and moving of furniture to keep me busy since Friday night. I almost have everything under control here, so I should be able to focus a little more on the site from now on (especially since I am procrastinating my search for a day job)!

When Lance said that we should write this week’s double take on getting phone numbers (or e-mail addresses, myspace pages, whatever) I thought it was a great subject. He believes that it’s easy to get a girl’s number, and not so easy to ensure that she picks up the phone when you call (or that she doesn’t flake before your date). I think that his point that you have to really wow her so that you stick in her memory is well taken. However, in my own experience dating the reason that you have to be really sure that you’re coming across as exceptional and not creepy is that many, many times the number that you are given isn’t even the girl’s real number.

When I was doing the club thing, if I wanted a guy to go away I would give him my phone number with the last two digits reversed (sorry, whoever’s phone that was!) or give out the Rejection Line (the local radio station had a fake phone number for people to give out with a mean message about how they’d been rejected and they would play subsequent messages on the morning show). I can only think of one time that I gave a guy my actual number, and the subsequent date was so horrible that I never did it again. So how can you make a good impression, ensure that the information is correct, and arrange that all-important second meetup? Continued