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Revelations Part III: What’s Your Fighting Style?

This is Part III of a series. You can read Part I here and Part II here.

Despite (or perhaps because) this is the revelation that I had first and feel is most important, it is the last (and hardest) to write. I started off by calling the post “what I could do differently,” and then I tried to come up with a name that had something to do with compromise, but nothing was working and I just couldn’t get started.

Then I had a conversation with Jake this morning before leaving for work that cleared things up for me. Despite not being especially philosophical, he is definitely a logical thinker because of his profession :-) Here’s what I realized:

There’s a lot of focus out there on people’s so-called “love styles.” In case you haven’t heard of this, you can read about it here, here, here, or here (For starters. There are similar quizzes everywhere). The styles are physical touch, quality time, gifts, words of affirmation, and acts of service. However, each and every “love style” is more than that – it is also a preferred communication style, which means it’s also your fighting style. And it’s just as important to know how to communicate when your relationship is under stress as it is when everything’s great (maybe more so). Continued

Sex & Work Updates

Wow!  Lance’s kinky sextacular has me all jealous.  Though I haven’t been playing durty games in shady hotel rooms on the beach, things have gotten somewhat better since my last post.  I’ve managed to sleep off the majority of my new-job exhaustion, and the BF has been really good about trying to get to bed at a reasonable hour even on the weekend.  This Monday he even got up for work when I did, which has never happened before.

Sex Update

We’re still not having sex quite as much as I would like, but we are managing to get in some solid nooky in in the weekends (including more pool sex…that thing is like an aphrodisiac, I can’t believe that we haven’t been using it more in the last year we’ve been at this place).  We managed to even work in a weekday last week, so I have high hopes that we’re on our way to getting a rhythm in place. Continued

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