I won’t lie, peeps. The last month or so has been pretty horrible. I had just given Jake the go-ahead to look for jobs in other states because he’s so miserable and pissed off all the time at his current job that he’s afraid it’s going to be the demise of our relationship. And while I currently have no plans to end things, I know why he’s afraid of that happening – he is terrible at compartmentalizing his anger and so when he’s frustrated he does any of the following:
- Avoids coming home (which he does to spare me his moods but which he doesn’t tell me about until the last second, which leads to me preparing intricate home-cooked meals he’s not around to eat, or me passing on invitations to go out with my own friends and then him calling me at 8 p.m. to say he’s going out, and it’s too late for me to resurrect my own plans),
- Comes home and picks a huge fight with me for basically no reason (like us being out of Propel or me cooking his favorite fish as a surprise for him when apparently he didn’t want fish that day),
- Plays video games for 5+ hours at a time and doesn’t talk to me (he bought a PS3 recently).
He (almost) always apologizes for these things, but it certainly isn’t stopping him from doing it in the first place. We haven’t had sex in almost a month and a couple of times I found myself Googling apartments and hotels because I just didn’t know what to do. (For the record, I still tried to initiate sex – after the fifth or so time he “rainchecked” me I gave up.) Continued