Random Thoughts On A Pickup Convention

This weekend in Orlando was the 21 Convention, one of the larger pickup conventions in the country. This one featured four days of speakers and several nights worth of going out and bootcamping. Unfortunately, I was out-of-town on a trip for almost the whole thing, returned on Saturday night, and I at least made it down to the convention on Sunday. My hope was to be able to hear Jason Savage speak, who’s blog I discovered very recently and became a fan of. I missed his presentation, did at least meet him and a few others, and it’s my hope to be able to do interviews with him and a couple of the coaches. Stay tuned for that.

Okay, so I’ll go ahead and state for the record, I’m never been to a PUA convention nor have I ever taken a bootcamp. The closest I’ve been to anything remotely like this was my amazing trip to the Dominican Republic last year with the boyz from TSBMag.com, Bobby Rio and Mike Stoute. You can read about how much I enjoyed and benefited from that trip in this testamonial, and if you want to read about the actual trip, start with this post about partying at the Drug Lord Palace.

The 21 Convention was definitely interesting and I thought it was worth blogging some of my thoughts.These are in no particular order.

1. The demographic, besides being all male (obviously), was mostly young, college age guys. Since the 21 Convention originally started as a convention for guys under the age of 21, this makes sense, although the convention organizers are actively marketing towards all ages. Besides all young males, I couldn’t help noticing there was a significant number of Asian guys! I guess those Asian dudes are still trying to figure out how to get with the blonde American girls. I can joke about that because I’m Asian…I like blondes, too ;)

2. I noticed there was an inordinate number of short dudes at this thing. Like, I felt tall, and I’m of medium height at best. I need to hang out at PU conventions more often.

3. Virtually every guy in the audience needed a gym membership and a personal trainer. Seriously, there were some doughy or skinny dudes in  there. My first advice for every guy in that room would have been to join a Crossfit gym and get their bodies hammered into fighting shape after 6 months, then worry about getting chicks. I’m serious as cancer when I say that. Nothing will make your life better or make you more naturally attractive than a serious does of fitness.

4. One kid, a short Asian (like 4″-5″ shorter than me), particularly struck me. He started a dialogue with one of the instructors after his presentation and this kid insisted that he wanted to be a pickup/dating instructor after he got good with game.  I wanted to scream at him: get good at something in your life, anything, and worry about chicks second!!! My second piece of advice to anyone in the room would have been: find something you’re passionate about and get really really good at it. The chicks will follow.

5. There was precisely ONE girl sitting in the audience, the girlfriend of the convention organizer, and a wannabe PUA had the balls to sarge her in between speakers. She ignored him into oblivion.

Okay, besides all that, I was fortunate enough to be able to watch the entirety of DJ Fuji’s presentation, which was nearly two hours in length. It was totally rock solid, very engaging and informative, and Fuji spoke with authority. I was really impressed. What I really liked was that he stressed having a well-rounded life and good fundamentals. No bullshit at all. Here’s a snippet of his presentation, the 6 most common pitfalls of getting better game:

  1. Not being well rounded
  2. Not working on yourself
  3. Being dogmatic – Sticking to one system or methodology
  4. Ego and having overinflated standards – I’m guilty of this, saying that I’ll only settle for a “10,” which fucks up a lot of my prospects.
  5. Focusing on outcome vs. process
  6. Guru worship – Thinking that guys with good game are cut from a different cloth.

Solid and no-nonsense. Fuji recently started his own dating and lifestyle coaching company and you can find out about that via his blog, The Tao of Fuji. I suspect he’s an excellent dating coach and, despite the multi-colored mohawk and crazy clothes, a down-to-Earth guy.

I wish could have been at the thing the entire time to get the whole skinny, but that’s what I got for ya. I made some connections with various instructors so I’m hoping to score a few interviews later in the week.

  • http://casualencounters.com/blog/ Janak

    Yeah, it seems slightly ridiculous to me that out-of-shape guys don’t consider that as something they need to address BEFORE worrying about the other stuff.
    .-= Janak´s last blog …Weekly Roundup – Top 10 Casual Sex Links from Around the Web =-.

  • http://thedreamlounge.net Dream

    Hey Lance

    Thanks for stopping by the last day, good seeing you again.

    Janak, I share your concern about health and vitality. Rest assure though, it was covered well by Drew Baye and myself at the event. It’s up to the attendees to apply however.

    Talk to you soon Lance, let’s nail the interview.

    -Dream
    .-= Dream´s last blog …“Follow Your Heart” =-.

  • http://dadshouseblog.com dadshouse

    Shouldn’t a pickup bootcamp be called booty-camp? Just sayin’…

    I’d be curious how the message of a conference like this compares to a Tony Robbins conference. I’m sure it’s more specific, but there’s got to be some cross over. No? Just curious.
    .-= dadshouse´s last blog …Your Friend is Cuter =-.

  • kingmaker

    Random thought: guys like the little Asian you wanted to scream at are probably already highly talented in several areas. Maybe they kick ass at Magic the Gathering tournaments; have a broad and thorough understanding of the canon from their favourite anime or manga; or fill a key position in a Civil War re-enactment group.

    The problem is that these areas of accomplishment carry no weight with the vast majority of women. Next time you should put an asterisk after “and the chicks will follow,” leading to some fine print at the bottom of the screen. ;)

  • http://honeyandlance.com Lance

    Kingmaker, thanks for reading, I’m actually writing a post about this very subject. Check back tomorrow.

  • http://honeyandlance.com Honey

    Hm, will your “I can out-dork you” routine work if the guy wins completely and utterly hands-down?

    LOL!
    .-= Honey´s last blog …Accomplish Something to Become More Attractive =-.

  • http://honeyandlance.com Lance

    Haha, probably not. The point isn’t to win the out-dorking contest, it’s merely to connect with a chick who identifies herself as a nerd or having nerdy qualities, which is really any intelligent and well educated chick. This also works great with hot chicks because it clearly pulls them off the pedestal, so to speak, and lets them see that you’re so comfortable in your own skin that you don’t mind calling yourself a nerd.

  • http://www.relationship-journal.com Mikko Kemppe – Relationship Coach

    I did not even know such an event existed. Sounds like a funny event though :). Enjoyed reading the article!
    .-= Mikko Kemppe – Relationship Coach´s last blog …Mikko, How Do I Get Over From Missing My Boyfriend? =-.