Comments on: People are Inherently Lazy: Or, Why We Over-Rank Ourselves

By: Are We Stuck In Our “Cute-agory” Forever? « The Adventures of Emily Legend

Tue, 29 Jul 2008 09:44:06 +0000

[...] read Honey and Lance’s story about rank and they pointed me to Evan Marc Katz’s article based on the NYT’s [...]

By: Blog Sponsor

Blog Sponsor — Tue, 22 Jul 2008 14:27:40 +0000

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By: Barbara Ling, Virtual Coach

Barbara Ling, Virtual Coach — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 22:09:16 +0000

I believe that so long as you’re brave enough to take ownership of your actions, your personal “rankings” don’t matter – it’s what your actions show about you that makes the impression.

Data points, Barbara

By: Overestimating Yourself:The Consequence of Change vs Inertia in Dating and Relationships : Baggage Reclaim - Dating, singles, relationships, sex tips and advice blog for men and women.

Mon, 21 Jul 2008 15:50:00 +0000

[...] visiting some of my favourite peeps HoneyandLance and Honey has written a brilliant post called People are Inherently Lazy: Or, Why We Over-Rank Ourselves, which was actually in response to a post by dating expert Evan Marc Katz called Do You [...]

By: NML

NML — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 14:12:48 +0000

This was brilliant! I find that women tend to overvalue superficial things like the looks, intelligence etc but they actually undervalue themselves overall. They want to change but fear going through with it so many can stay trapped in inertia and blaming others for their position! I have to write about this right away!
Honey, you are a frickin genius!
Oh and congrats to you both for joining Brazen Careerist x

By: The Dateable Dork

The Dateable Dork — Sun, 20 Jul 2008 17:14:43 +0000

Honestly, I think the whole idea of ranking yourself is a little silly, but it does get you to think about an imporant question: are you really where you want to be in those four categories? I could care less how I “rank” compared to other people, as long as I’m happy with what I’m doing, where I am in life, etc. If you think about one of those categories and realize you’d really like to improve, that’s a great catalyst for action. But do I really care if I’m less attractive or intelligent than the next person? Not really…

… especially because I’m a 10 in all four categories. : ) Ha!!!

The Dateable Dorks last blog post..An open letter to my future lover

By: cheekie

cheekie — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 02:07:01 +0000

Brilliant.
It is indeed much easier in the short term to overestimate yourself.
No accountabily, no remorse, an appearance of ‘not caring’.
Also, we are led to believe that thinking positively is the catalyst for change. Therefore if you think you are a 9, others will perceive you that way.
We all know people who think they are, and we know damn well they aren’t.

The people I most admire are the ones who see their faults clearly, see the changes needed – in order to be who THEY want to be, not society, and make positive choices, not false positive preconceptions of what they THINK they should be.

I always underrank myself. Always. And it isn’t a low self esteem issue, it’s just that I know I am not where I want to or need to be in certain areas. A dear friend of mine told me the other night, as I was discussing this with him, that I am way way more than I think I am.
I was flattered, especially about the 15 on a scale of 1-10 in attractiveness…lol…but I still don’t believe it where it matters.
In my head and heart.

I was also brought up to believe that overestimated your value is a sure way to get knocked down, fast and hard.

You have to earn it, believe it and value every effort you make.

Human nature is funny, we are a society run by what we don’t have as opposed to what we do. No matter what, there’s always more.
Advertising has been built on the very principles you described above.
And it works.

and btw, thanks for calling me fabulous!
xo

By: TentCamper

TentCamper — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 17:21:32 +0000

I completely agree. Laziness will get you nowhere. If you put in a bit of effort and are a good, honest, confident person…success is sure to follow.

Love your blog. I have added you to my blogroll.

By: lisaq

lisaq — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 14:49:28 +0000

I completely agree that we tend to underestimate how valuable change can be. We have to be able to understand the benefits we reap if we get over ourselves, get off our lazy butts, and do something. Changing to increase our ranking is damn hard work and people who can't see the immediate pay off will opt to just take the path of least resistance. Laziness as you said. The trick is to have enough foresight to see what rewards you will reap. For me, realizing how bad it really was and being able to see what I could gain were the things that pushed me into action. lisaqs last blog post..The First Mr. Unavailable in My Life

By: Evan Marc Katz

Evan Marc Katz — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 05:04:09 +0000

Great observation, Honey. Wish I wrote it myself!

Keep up the good work.

Evan