Are you fucking with me? I met this chick online and her last name is Lance. Seriously. Is that a sign or something? She’s also a Leo, and Leos get along swimmingly well with Geminis. Go read any love astrology site. Back in the day, I had this one gf who was a Leo and let me tell you, the sex was off the hook. But, I digress. The new girl’s first name is Kitty. Kitty Lance. I told her her name sounded like a porn star name, and her response was, “Yeah, I get that a lot.” I think we’ll get along pretty well.
I’ve been running some good email+text+phone game on Kitty and I’ve got a day 1 set up with her for tonight. My plan is to have us meet at my fav spot, the Vietnamese restaurant, for drinks. There’s a free concert downtown, so I’ll bounce us to that for a bit. I also discovered a great rooftop martini bar that I think we’ll stop at. Should be a fucking blast. My goal is to go for a makeout close.
Okay, here’s how it went down tactically.
First off, her profile headline was, “Lie About How We First Met.” That caught my eye, and if you’re a chick, you should steal it because you’ll get cool responses from guys. In fact, this is a nice little screening tool. The better the response, the higher caliber of guy.
I wrote this awesome fiction about how I was running the Boston Marathon and she almost ran me over with her car, then she gave me these fresh blueberry muffins as an apology, and how she wrote her digits on my hand before I took off running. I threw in a lot of fun adjectives and hyperbole. Her profile said she liked running and dessert, so I figured the Boston Marathon and muffins would strike a chord. It did. She emailed back almost immediately with how that was the best response she’s ever gotten. Pretty slick, huh?
If you’re a dude doing the online thing, try making up a funny story about how you first met the girl, then send it to her as your opener. Doesn’t matter what her headline says, just jump into it:
“Okay, this is what we’re going to tell people about how we met. Blah blah blah.”
Make sure it’s amusing, clever, and embeds stuff from her profile. Go over the top. If she’s got half a brain she’ll respond.
Also, I lifted a great subject header from JLAIX. My subject line alternates between one of these three:
- I’m a douchbag, will you be my friend?
- I’m a dork, will you be my friend?
- I’m a nerd, will you be my friend?
Calibrate to her profile. If she strikes you as a party girl, try the douchebag line. If she looks like she was a nerd in high school, try that one. It’ll resonate. I’ve had a good initial response so far, although it’s not extensively tested.
Remember how last week I royally choded it up and apologized for my job with Artsy Chick, when in actuality I’m really passionate about it? Well, I fixed that and emailed Kitty a long para on how passionate I was about what I do. It worked. She said my passion was evident and that it was an attractive trait. I asked for the meetup in the same email and she agreed. She then sent me her phone number. I strengthened the connection later in the day with a bit of text game:
ya know, gems and leos are supposed to get along great
She texted back with, “I know. give me a call this evening.” I did, and we had a relatively normal conversation. I teased her a bit and told two of my trusty stories, ones that demostrate high value and also elicit laughs. Convo lasted about 20′.
I’ll flirt, tease, run compliance, escalate, and hopefully get the girl. Full report tomorrow…