This is part 1 in a series of interviews with dating coaches and social artists. This is based on my original post, 7 Thought Leaders in the Dating and Pickup Industry. Check it out. Be sure to see what each thought leader had to say…these perspectives are absolutely off-the-hook.
1. Based on your experience, what is your perspective on modern dating and how has it evolved in the last decade or so?
My experience with dating comes almost exclusively from women I’ve met off of cold approaches. In fact I think I can count the times I’ve met girls through friends on my toes and fingers. But to me dating has probably never been much different. The idea that everyone ends up with someone that is awesome and perfect for them seems much more like the extreme rather than the norm. That said, you have to date a lot of women or men to meet one you’ll really be into. That’s just the facts, unfortunately most people are not right for you. Even if you really want them to be. So you have to be open to the idea that to get a great relationship, you have to get out there.
“The idea that everyone ends up with someone that is awesome and perfect for them seems much more like the extreme rather than the norm.”
As for how dating has evolved in the past few years, I think the rise of the internet and websites like Facebook, Myspace and HotorNot, has altered the dating landscape forever. You also have an increased lack of intimate communication with the almost universal adaptation of text messages. I’m curious to see how technology will continue to impact the dating landscape.
2. How has pickup affected the playing field, and do you see pickup
going mainstream any time soon?
I don’t think pickup will ever truly go mainstream, because the content is too out there for most people. It’s hard to explain away the manipulative aspect of changing yourself for the better to get women. Throw in the random cast of characters from a magician who dresses like the Cat in the Hat, to a 50 year old who openly talks about hypnotizing women into giving him blowjobs, and I think it’s a tough sell. Hopefully the guys who are really normal and progressive in their methods will continue to come to the forefront. Because I think the perception of the community is fairly different from what I think a lot of these guys actually want.
3. Where do you see dating and courtship headed in the future, like in
10 or 20 years from now?
I don’t really think dating will change much. Women and men will always find a way to get together. As for dating science, I think it will be around and advancing for as long as we continue to date. I think a lot of the techniques and tactics will evolve and a lot of what we believe to work now, will probably be revealed to be less accurate than we think. I’m excited to see where the body of knowledge is headed.
4. Do you see any evolutions or new trends emerging in dating / relationships?
I think that everyone is starting to finally realize that getting laid is not that hard, once you have a decent identity, fashion sense, and an absence of social and sexual anxiety. However after a little while that starts to become incredibly empty and that the true path to happiness and longevity in the game is finding women you’re attracted to whom you have a high level of compatibility with. What this means is you need to figure out who you are and what you want FIRST. I always say this to girls, but it’s true the most important person in any relationship is you.
“I think that everyone is starting to finally realize that getting laid is not that hard, once you have a decent identity, fashion sense, and an absence of social and sexual anxiety.”
5. What’s your best piece of advice for someone jumping into the
dating pool? How about looking for a healthy relationship?
For someone who’s just getting into the dating scene, I’d highly recommend they check out my free ebook The Game Acceleration doctrine that you can download Here. In it, I lay down the fundamentals of how to become (for lack of a better word) a normal guy. It focuses on fashion, dealing with both sexual and social anxiety, body language, tonality and all the stuff you need to get started meeting women. If we can all agree on the idea that people can learn how to get better at dating, it’s time we established what the base levels are for guys who have been anti-social for a few years.
For those who are looking for a healthy relationship, I’d recommend getting started by figuring out what kind of girl or guy you think you’d get along with long term. This is a time to be really honest and make a list of 10 NON physical characteristics you want in a partner. Then make a separate list of WHERE a person like that would hang out. Now you know where to start looking. Then make sure that you’re open and honest about what you want early on, and treat the person the way you want your relationship to be. Don’t do a ton of things early on that you won’t be doing later, because then you’ll see problems once the “honeymoon” period ends.
6. What’s on the horizon for Sinn in 2009?
Next year, I’ll be releasing 4 different products. First I’ll be releasing the Day Game product in conjunction with Love Systems. This product will be everything you ever wanted to know about meeting women during the day. The next product will be a 1 hour DVD on natural attraction. In it I explain how there are underlying mechanisms that cause attraction built in to many routines, but if you can understand these mechanisms you’ll never be at a loss for material ever again. I believe this is the first time anyone has actually showed you what you need to be in order to attract women naturally. Finally, I’ll be releasing my seminars on Same Night Lays and Breaking out of The Friend Zone.
Personally, I’ll be living in a different city every month starting in May. I’m writing a book called 12 Cities in 12 Months about trying to find a city to live in. I’m also going to be running my coaching program and doing one boot camp a month in each city.
Pretty excited about that!
Here’s the original post that inspired the interview series. Be sure to check out the interviews with the other thought leaders: