(Live in a state of abundance.)
When I say harem, I mean “dating” multiple girls at the same time and having sex with all of them (or at least several). In pickup parlance, this is referred to as mLTR (multiple long term relationships). This arrangement works if you’re upfront and totally honest with these women, and practicing safe sex. Fellas, if you’re getting to this level, make sure you establish what you’re about from the get-go. Doing the mLTR thing will only work if you’ve got totally solid game and the girls know it. If you’re not upfront about your pimp status, they’ll think you’re simply skeezing around, or even “cheating” if you’ve accidentally fallen into a traditional bf-gf model with any one of them.
It’s also perfectly fine to date multiple women and not have sex with any of them, or maybe just one. This is a safe alternative and you can achieve approximately the same level of fulfillment and independence that I’ll talk about below.
Dating multiple people is something that most unmarried HB’s do at some point when they’re not locked up in LTR’s. This often includes having sex with one or more partners. Have you ever met a chick who said she was just going through a dating phase? Chances are she’s playing the field and sleeping with a couple of dudes. Think Samantha from Sex in the City. I met a 9 over the holiday who admitted she was in a dating phase and averaged a new sexual partner every week. Think about that for a second. One of her new years resolutions was to NOT have sex until June or until she found a steady. (BTW, I didn’t pull the chick, although I thought about it.)
For the newbies out there who are trying to score a 9 or 10, it’s important to make this realization: hot chicks can get sex whenever they want. They have choice and live in a state of abundance. That’s an important realization to make, because now you can understand why an HB will blow off a guy with weak game. She has so many guys approaching her that she can afford to be selective. In fact, she has to, for safety purposes.
So, for aspiring pimps, it’s important to make realization #2: YOU can turn the table and live in a state of abundance also. Not only is this a fulfilling and exciting lifestyle, but it can go a long way towards your emotional development. Dating several women and practicing harem maintenance will make you less clingy and needy. It forces you to get organized and work out your social calendar. When you get to the point where you’ve had plenty of sex and dated tons of chicks, you begin to realize, damn, I don’t need a girlfriend to feel good about myself. Having a women doesn’t validate me. I’m perfectly happy doing my own thing.
“I’m a cool dude and I can work on my own projects and get laid whenever I want to.”
That’s a powerful point for a man to reach. It’s emotional independence, and it allows us to reclaim our masculinity and stop being chodes, douchebags, and wussies.
Another good reason to maintain a harem is for variety. Why get locked up with a chick who gets on your nerves and is obviously not a good match? In case you hadn’t noticed, most couples aren’t good matches for each other, which is a hard and cold reality. If you date multiple women you can be fulfilled on many different levels. Want a girlfriend you can watch sports with? Need someone you can party with on Friday nights? Keep adding them to the lineup. Think of it as a team approach to sexual and emotional fulfillment.
After you’ve done the mLTR, you’ll be much more emotionally stable, more in touch with your purpose and your masculinity, and better prepared to take on a single LTR and satisfy a single girlfriend.
On the flipside, I think it’s totally cool for a chick to date and have multiple partners also. A true pimp doesn’t judge a woman as being a slut. Slut is an outdated concept, just like the old model of dating. We’re part of the secret society (credit TD) of pimps and if you’re in the secret society, you’re cool. Sex is just a thing we do. Conventional notions of dating and romance are dead as fuck, and I say good riddance.
(All three of them? Yup, all three.)
Note: If you’re going to sleep with multiple hotties, get tested, cover your jimmy, and make sure you don’t get a friggin disease. I agree with Honey on this subject, using a rubber sucks, but whatever you’re still busting a nut and not getting elephantitis of the balls.