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About the Author

Lance is an aspiring social artist based in Orlando, Florida. His goal is to be a kickass dude, meet cool people, and generally dominate at everything. He enjoys sports, surfing, socializing, reading and writing. You can contact Lance via email here or online here.

Geeks and Nerds Make Shitty Boyfriends

Found this craigslist post while digging around. Couldn’t tell if the author was serious or what. She (presumably the author is female) gives 15 reasons why geeks and nerds make good boyfriends. Ha! As if. I’m going to debunk that right now…

(These guys make terrible bf’s)

1.”The smooth dude with the sly grin and spider hands?” What the hell does that mean? Yeah, the smooth guy wants to bone the hottie. Everyone wants to bone the hottie. Duh.

2. True

3. Great. Women love it when you go totally overboard with the romantic lovey dovey stuff. Here’s some good advice. Buy her a dozen roses on your first date and write her a poem. Heh heh. See how long that lasts.

4. True. There certainly are plenty of geeks and nerds to choose from. Try any IT or programming department at any company anywhere.

5. Brains, true. Problem is, they’ve got no skillzzz playa!

6. Remembering dates, BORING. That’s why I have a facebook account. Duh.

7. Sex. Hahahaha! Yeah, I dare you to have sex with a nerd! I’m sure that dorky software engineer from the 3rd floor is AWESOME in the sack. Probably lasts all night too and gives great head.

8. Low maintenance, hmm. Yeah, I’ll buy that, that is until you try to break up with your inexperienced, socially awkward dork. See how unneedy, unclingy, and low maintenance he is then.

9. Yeah, they don’t frequent bars, but they DO frequent LAN, pen-and-paper D&D, and Halo 3 parties. Have fun there.

10. Dude, can I get my gf to dress like an elf princess? That’s fucking hot…I’d have to bonk her six times while she was wearing the elf outfit before I even got to the parking lot. Damn, I’m pitching a tent here.

11. Friends aren’t jerks, but they’re socially awkward and kinda lame. Oh yeah, can’t wait till you introduce your hottie girlfriends to your new geek bf’s gamer clan. Talk about social value plummeting, whooosh.

12. They’re not possessive, but again, try breaking up with your geek. Psycho!

13. Everyone is educated these days. Degrees are a dime a dozen.

14. They speak good English and don’t get wasted, sure, I’ll buy that one.

15. What’s wrong with “Damn baby you got a fine ass”? Seriously? I say that one all the time.

Lance is a former geeky nerd and he played pen-and-paper D&D over the weekend. Don’t hate.


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19 Comments »

Comment by evilwoobieNo Gravatar
2008-06-12 09:55:59

I have a geek for a BF, but he doesn’t look like the stereotypical geek. And he’s a wonderful lover. I dunno, maybe it’s because i’m a geek myself^^pen and paper DnD rocks! That’s how we met btw.

Consider this: you have a hot bf who happens to play xbox longer than most guys. He has the same libido as other men, but depending on how addicted he is to games, he will usually play rather than fuck. My trick is to schedule the sex. “You can play til 9 but by 10 pm we fuck, ok?” << lol

The only “other woman” in his life is his gadgets and games, but they don’t have pussies so I’m not threatened. And he switches to new ones when they become obsolete. A willing, real life GF who doesn’t mind his passion is the only constant thing in his life.

 
Comment by Holly HoffmanNo Gravatar
2008-06-12 10:14:44

I’m a subscriber to Nerd Love myself. I’m actually the IT nerd in our relationship – he thinks it’s a hilarious role reversal. I’m the one counting down the days/hours/minutes until the Steve Jobs keynote, twittering with megageeks like Robert Scoble, updating my GoogleReader, and fixing his laptop.

My brand of geek is usually an inner one, kinda like me. I’m a geek dressed in hot girl’s clothes – a sexy office dress, come-f-me heels, and dark-rimmed glasses. Sexy librarian, if you will. I like my guys the same way – hot exterior, super-nerd interior. I got out of the shower this morning and the BF was already cooking the books. HOT.

And I love when he ditches the contacts and dons the glasses. It’s like living with Superman and Clark Kent. I have chocolate and vanilla.

Holly Hoffmans last blog post..I Do – For Seven Years

Comment by Holly HoffmanNo Gravatar
2008-06-12 10:15:14

Oh, and as to the sex, a little inner freak never hurts either.

Holly Hoffmans last blog post..I Do – For Seven Years

 
Comment by LanceNo Gravatar
2008-06-12 12:21:03

I have a thing for nerdy girls who grow up to be hotties. By thing, I mean a major raging hard-on. They’re grounded, emotionall stable, and generally nicer because they aren’t spoiled from years of being fawned over. True diamonds in the rough. If I find one of these, I’m scooping her up in a second.

Lances last blog post..Damn! Sex for 101 Days Straight! Big Ups!

Comment by Holly HoffmanNo Gravatar
2008-06-13 21:16:53

Oh, you’ll enjoy this: http://www.newsweek.com/id/140457?GT1=43001.

Holly Hoffmans last blog post..When "Relaxation" Becomes Plain Lazy

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Comment by LanceNo Gravatar
2008-06-13 22:48:27

Fuck yeah.

 
 
 
 
Comment by Bobby RioNo Gravatar
2008-06-12 12:11:18

Hilarious Lance….

“Friends aren’t jerks, but they’re socially awkward and kinda lame”

all so true lol

 
Comment by JonsiNo Gravatar
2008-06-12 15:33:10

I think it’s a mixed bag. You can be a nerd, or a reformed geek, and have good social skills. There’s nothing wrong with reading Scientific American and The Economist in your free time. Nerdy traits are just that, traits, and I think a few of them are attractive to most women. The important thing is to be well rounded enough that you can connect with people different than you. A girl who watches The Hills and has seen the Sex and the City movie 3 times called me a nerd the other night because I wanted to go see an artsy farty flick that was well reviewed in some indie magazines. That doesn’t mean I wasn’t motorboating her knockers in the elevator of the parking garage later that night.

Have nerdy traits and own them, just do not be defined by those traits.

Jonsis last blog post..Published and parmesan’d

 
Comment by cheekieNo Gravatar
2008-06-12 22:36:06

I have to admit it.
I am a bit of a geek.
Ok, a big bit.

Computers-(I watch the keynote too Holly), I knit, crochet and sew, would rather spend my time reading than be with most people, I have cats. Nuf said.

BUT, I love jager shots, drinking beer with the guys, dancing like an idiot till at least 3am, and tattoo’s. yum, lots of tattoo’s…

As a friend told me last night ‘you are a dangerous woman’…still not quite sure what he meant by that, but I think it was a compliment…lol.

cheekies last blog post..Space…Cheekie’s final frontier

 
Comment by Me ThinksNo Gravatar
2008-06-13 09:03:35

Well I am into really brainy guys that are a little geeky but of course have social skills. There is an in between here – not the guy the CL writer is referring to and not the player type you are pimping, but someone between the two. Frankly I cannot be in any LTR with any guy that isn’t super brainy. That to me is the ultimate turn on, if there is intense chemistry and he is super smart, I’m all over it, looks are way less important (although being in shape is). I dig on the engineering types that have a life and social skills outside of techy stuff.

Of course I might be skewed because I’m in IT (although I have an art background, this pays better). My bf has a thing for me in glasses too :)

 
Comment by marcNo Gravatar
2008-06-13 15:39:03

I can dig the hot librarian type, but when the nerdiness kind of annoys me is when the woman wants to play a sport with me, like tennis, or racquetball, and they suck so bad it makes the whole thing incredibly irritating.

marcs last blog post..My Balls

 
Comment by SheComesFirstNo Gravatar
2008-06-17 18:23:45

“7. Sex. Hahahaha! Yeah, I dare you to have sex with a nerd! I’m sure that dorky software engineer from the 3rd floor is AWESOME in the sack. Probably lasts all night too and gives great head.”

Actually, while this does not necessarily apply universally to nerds, some of them ARE awesome in the sack, last all night, and give great head! Personal experience…

SheComesFirsts last blog post..Seasons my ass

 
Comment by LadygirlNo Gravatar
2008-07-23 00:31:31

Listen, I’m not a geek or a nerd. I’m an actress and model who’s dated other actors and models and they SUCK!! After being dumped by a male model I met on a shoot one day (he was bi-curious and dumped me for another male model), I’d decided enough was enough. I swallowed my pride and tried internet dating. After a couple months I found the sweetest, most loveable RPG, computer-savvy gamer “geek” with a lovely set of baby-blues.( He’s the kind of geek that always got the “just friends” line from girls, and usually got passed by… Those girls were STUPID!) And I’ve never been more in love in my entire life. He’s often told me he’s worried I might leave him for some handsome young costar, but he has no idea how wonderful he is in comparison to the typical egotistical pretty-boy trash I normally have to deal with. He tells me he feels so lucky to date someone like me, but I’M the lucky one!!

…And ooooooooh, what a lover…

Girls, take it from me, the geeks GOT IT GOIN ON!!

 
Comment by lisaqNo Gravatar
2008-10-05 19:35:55

great post and picture, really good point about terrinble geeks and nerds :D

 
Comment by JulietteNo Gravatar
2009-04-13 18:47:33

7. Sex. Hahahaha! Yeah, I dare you to have sex with a nerd! I’m sure that dorky software engineer from the 3rd floor is AWESOME in the sack. Probably lasts all night too and gives great head.

Lol Haters. You don’t know what you’re missing. Nerds/Geeks are delicious! I’ve had 2 nerdy guys (still with one of them) and both are awesome! They can get rough which I love. All that pent up sexual energy and the pent up aggression from people, like Lance and Honey, who shit on them all those years, make for very VERY nice combination of hair pulling and ass spanking. (I guess I should be thanking you for giving them shit, hehe!) Plus from all those lonely nights of watching free web porn, OOh they DO their homework! Good head INDEED! That’s why they get 4.0 GPAs.

 
Comment by ianNo Gravatar
2009-12-18 22:07:27

ok, i guess, i mean if you like jerks and jocks that treat you like crap, and only want to use you, yeah, i guess if that’s what you want them for, to be abused, to be treated like nothing, your whole life, go ahead, i as a nerd, am not like in the picture, most people that look like that get married because they have enough goodness in them to actually care for you, and to provide you with something…. nerds are very misunderstood, they get picked on by the fucking idiots because they’re not as smart as them…. i have had girls like me, and you know what? I AM A NERD!!! AND PROUD OF IT!!! so if you make fun of nerds, your basically not thankful of all the things nerds made you in your life

computers
phones
cell phones
caers
speakers
guitars
ipods
mac computers
windows vista/7/xp

if all that was gone you wouldnt even have your website….

you should be thanking nerds for all the great stuff we gave you

go ahead and make fun of me for being smart and having glasses, because you know what? i dont give a fuck!

nerds are better than the jocks…. trust me

 
Comment by LanceNo Gravatar
2009-12-19 02:52:00

Windows Vista?? Seriously?

Hey, nerds made Wordpress, and I LOVE wordpress. So you’ve got that.

 
Comment by HoneyNo Gravatar
2009-12-19 16:44:09

Yeah, I’m not sure that any of their other inventions is enough to make up for what I have gone through with Windows Vista.
Honey´s last blog …How to say “Bad Motherf**cker” in a job interview and get the job

 
2010-02-27 20:51:22

[...] Second, the rebuttal, from Honey and Lance. [...]

 
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