So one of my favorite shows is the HBO series Entourage. I’m pretty much enamored of the ridiculous LA lifestyle that Vincent Chase and Co. lead: partying, driving sweetass cars, dating super beautiful women, making tons of money, chilling with other celebs. It’s a total fantasy (unless you’re actually a celebrity) but it’s good escapism.
One of their current plotlines is the relationship of the main character, Vince Chase, with his new girlfriend Sasha Grey. Sasha Grey is a super popular porn star, the 2008 AVN female performer of the year among other awards, and she plays herself on the show. Vince and Sasha meet at a club, start talking, one thing leads to another and boom they’re dating. Their relationship is actually kind of sweet but also has a dark side.
One of the questions the writers pose is, assuming you had the wherewithal to date Sasha Grey, could you handle the implications of dating a porn star? On the show, Grey is offered a part in an adult film and Vince reacts negatively. He has a minor freak out, eventually apologizes and offers to support her decision, and when pressed by her insistence to do the film, he gets frustrated and tries to manipulate her into not doing it. He even goes so far as to secure her a part in his next film, a mainstream blockbuster type flick. Sasha stands her ground says she is going to do the porn. This is further complicated when Sasha admits that her ex-fiance is one of the co-stars in her film.
So I think there’s a great thought experiment in here. If you had the ability to date a popular and attractive pornstar, could you do it, and would you be okay with her fucking other dudes on camera? Could you be “in a relationship” if you had the knowledge that your chick was having sex with 10 other guys every time she made a movie?
Vince has a pretty uncool reaction and he’s accused by Sasha of trying to control her. Vince plays the love card and insists that he doesn’t want to share her with other guys.
I’ve had a pretty strong reaction to the plotline so far. Sasha Grey is a porn star and that’s part of her identity, sexual and otherwise. She’s perfectly okay with having sex on camera as her livelihood and also having a regular relationship outside of work. She can make that differentiation. On paper, I would like to think I would support that and be totally cool with it. Of course I’ve never been in a relationship with a pornstar, so I don’t know how I would really react. But, I want to say it would be liberating. I would love to date a woman who was that open with her sexuality. I will admit this now, but it’s actually one of my fantasies to watch my girlfriends have sex with other dudes.
But I just don’t know, because I’ve never met someone that far-out and I suspect I might feel intimidated. Women who are more experienced than me make me a little nervous. I also find it exciting/enthralling. I like that edginess in a relationship because it’s a fantastic opportunity to hold my ground as a man and maintain my masculine identity. It’s a daily test to date sexually open and experienced women. Basically, the test is, can you hang? Can you still be the man when you know she’s had many many other men? Someone on the level of a Sasha Grey would be overwhelming.
But holy cow, the sex would be amazing!! I would have to take a shot at it.
Could you date a pornstar? Who’s right and who’s wrong in this situation?
Check out Sasha’s Twitter page, which she updates regularly.