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Honey’s Greatest Hits: The Guy Who Said I Gave Him Herpes

This is probably one of my funniest dating stories in retrospect, though it was not funny in the least at the time!  As I mentioned in a recent post, after Lance and I broke up “officially,” I hooked up with two guys in 24 hours.  One of these guys was someone I had known for about 2 years who I had always had something of a mutual crush with.  He was by then working for an academic publishing house, though I’d met him when he was a graduate student in history.  His name was Evan.

Since we’d known each other for some time, and also because he knew I was moving, it was pretty clear (even without telling him all the deets of my recent breakup) that this was a pure hookup situation, NSA sex.  We used a condom, it didn’t break, nothing weird about the encounter at all except he did speak Portuguese fluently and there was a lot of sexy talk I didn’t understand but which turned me on pretty effectively.  A couple of weeks after our date, I moved to Arizona.  Then he called me a month later,

“Is there anything about your sexual past you need to share with me?” were the first words out of his mouth. Continued

How Far Do We Go To Change Our Partners?

So from writing my last post about banging a chick other than my girlfriend, and the subsequent comments, a question has popped into my head that I thought was worth giving it’s own blog post.

It goes like this. I’m in this relationship for half a year and everything is great EXCEPT the sex is lousy. Every commenter suggested the first step towards dealing with this dilemma is to talk with her and communicate what I’m feeling and thinking. Great. In my mind, what exactly does that talk accomplish? I see three scenarios: A) The talk is going to accomplish nothing and possibly lead to breakup (possible), b) She acquiesces 100% and somehow lets me do whatever I want sexually (highly unlikely), or c) we compromise and meet somewhere in the middle (likely).

Continued

I Nailed A Chick Other Than My Girlfriend

I nailed this chick the other weekend who wasn’t my girlfriend. I couldn’t help it, I needed to have a killer bang session, something I haven’t had since I started dating Heather over six months ago. This was an all-time showstopper, a 20 orgasm affair that was basically an unfilmed porno, that lasted until early in the morning, and left both of us exhausted. I loved every second of it.

Here’s how it went down. I’ve been stringing along this mediocre chick, who I referenced in this post here, via text message for a couple of weeks. Well, Friday night rolled around, I was already out with my boys, and I texted her to see if she wanted to meet for drinks. Continued

My Girlfriend Is Awesome. But The Sex Is Terrible

Balls! How I get into these situations? I’ve been seeing this girl for about six months, which is a decent long time for me. My girlfriend, who’s name is Heather, is pretty much the best girlfriend on the planet. She’s like a perfect 10 as a girlfriend, the complete opposite of my last long-term partner, Megan, who was a complete bitch. I have one complaint and it’s a big one: the sex is terrible.

When I say terrible I don’t mean horrible-terrible, like 10 car pileup bad, but more like pull-my-hair-out frustrating because it’s so vanilla it’s practically soft serve. I have blogged several posts about my ridiculous monkey sex episodes, which can be found here, here, and here. I’m into crazy-ass, kinky sex and vanilla sex is…well, boring.

Continued

TBK is Writing an Ebook and Going Viral

As promised, I pinged TBK and got an update from her:

Continued

TBK Relaunch on 5.17.10

Uh oh, TBK is up to something! There is a mysterious video on her (former) site’s homepage thanking their supporters and also a line about a returning on 5.17.10. Don’t know any details but I will attempt to ascertain them. One can only hope that TBK and her crew are giving the middle finger to the asshat company that fired her in the process. Hooray for sex bloggers!

Continued

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