Hey everyone! I’ve been off in a little reflective mode lately, as I mentioned in my sort-of New Year’s Resolutions post that I was going to be taking stock of my life and making a conscious effort to do the things that make me happiest. The thinking part gummed up my blogging mojo for a bit, but I decided that it was time to report on my progress in some different areas. Continued
I have found myself wondering a lot recently why the majority of relationships end. I mean, at best you get one relationship that works out in a “forever” way. While I’m with Lance that just because a relationship ended doesn’t mean that it failed, why are they all ending in the first place? My relationship with Jake has lasted far longer than any other I’ve had, and it’s going great – what makes this one so different?
I think the answer lies in video games. Continued
I’m not even sure where to start with this. I’ve followed the Tiger Woods scandal only passingly via ESPN.com, which is sanitized compared to the dirt that’s flying around the general Internet. I read Dad’s House post on the Tiger Wood’s affair and followed a bunch of links. And then I got totally immersed into the depraved and ridiculous saga. This thing is so otherworldly and beyond the scope of a normal person’s experience that it blows me away. It reads like a Hunter S. Thompson novel but with way more sex and money. I don’t even feel like I can properly judge it because the game these people are playing is stratospherically above my head.
I thought that Lance’s recent post on How to Qualify a Relationship was excellent, and his description if himself as a “bursty” worker being one of the things that makes the quality time love style very difficult for him was a worthy insight. So worthy that it got me thinking about my own work style.
You see, where for Lance,
My brain gets really tired each day, way before my body or my emotional center runs out of energy. WAY before. I have a finite amount of this mind energy, and that energy runs out after 3-4 hours. After that, I’m basically a zombie mentally. Once I’m in this low energy state, I have to recharge, and I do that by napping, reading, watching TV, or otherwise fucking around in private.
I do not experience these types of creative energy spikes with any regularity. Sure, if I have a really long day at work or am under stress about something specific, then I might get emotionally/intellectually tired. But for the most part, I wake up fairly early and chug along at a steady pace all day (Lance would say it’s the Virgo in me). Continued
I am totally convinced that the 5 love languages are essential to qualifying a relationship. In fact, I think it’s the #1 key to a successful relationship. Forget all this stuff about honesty and respect. Although those are important, too. I’ll explain.
I wrote back in July how your love style can help or hinder you on dates. This was before I knew anything about the Chapman book. At that point I noticed how small conflicts in the way I communicated with my girlfriends could turn into huge issues down the road. But I didn’t have the vocabulary or the principles nailed down to really understand it. Then, Honey turned me onto Chapman in her post here, and I blogged about love styles (ie Love Languages) further when I wrote about insights from dating three chicks at once. Then I read the book. Now, I have a context and a way to quantify communication with my partner.
They say that the holidays are a time for family – well, maybe. Sort of. Though our relationships with our families are far from typical. Is there anyone who is typical?
This weekend my best friend from grad school was in town because her boyfriend’s parents live here, and they ended up staying with us because his parents didn’t have room (and also because we’re obviously cooler to stay with). Sarcasm and alcohol, just like old times…
Oh, and their 6 1/2 month old baby.
He was very adorable (if periodically cranky) and I shocked everyone when they went out for coffee and left me with him – apparently she and her boyfriend were deciding how much they’d bet that the baby was screaming when they walked back in…but he was sound asleep in my arms. Awww. Continued