relationships

So last night the BF and I were watching this crazy tv show called Manswers (that’s how bad the summer tv drought is hitting our TiVo), and one of the segments was on what type of women are best in bed.  First they polled a bunch of dudes and asked them whether they thought party girls, gymnasts, or smart girls would be best in bed.  I was taken aback by the fact that there are, apparently, only 3 types of women (and one of those types is gymnast?!) but surprised and pleased that they at least edited the footage to suggest that there was a three day tie.

The expert sexologist stated that party girls and gymnasts aren’t nearly as good in bed as smart girls (though “college-educated” was their definition of smart and I’ve taught too many courses at the university level to buy that).  Woo-hoo, Dateable Dork, Vix, and me are all phenomenal in bed!  As if you all didn’t know that.  I did think it was funny that the show didn’t mention whether the same was true for fellas (though the BF pointed out that such claims might alienate the majority of the Manswers demographic). Continued

I try to live my life by the idea that happiness is a decision you make, not something you wait to happen to you.  With that in mind, I’ve made all sorts of decisions that, apparently, are difficult for many people.  Moving across the country to get a PhD in something I’d basically never heard of.  Starting a relationship/sex blog.  Most recently, quitting my job as a teaching assistant at the U and moving to another city to live with my boyfriend–without even having a job.

My best friend often says that my ability to pursue the path I think is right for me regardless of whether it’s easy or not is one of the qualities she admires the most about me.  However, I have to admit that this move has been fucking tough. I could really relate when I read Holly Hoffman’s post on Introducing a New Person Into Your Life, but I couldn’t help but think–what about when you’re the new person?  Because although we’ve been together over two years, I haven’t been trying to incorporate my man into an existing routine.  I’ve completely changed everything about my life and have been trying to build a new routine–in some ways an easier thing, but in other ways much harder. Continued

I was inspired to ask this question after reading the responses to my post about letting your children know if you’re getting nooky. Basically, if you’re a parent, do you teach your kid(s) about sex, and if so, at what age does this happen and to what degree? Before I rip into it, watch this funny Mad TV clip:

Continued

So in this article on Dating Ugly, I try to unravel the mysteries behind why gorgeous women would date guys who are significantly less good-looking than they are.  While I came down on the side of insecurity as the driving force behind such pairings, what if you’re totally, utterly secure in your fabulous good looks?  Previously there was only HotOrNot.com, a free way to not only judge your little heart out, but get judged and maybe find love.  The BF met his ex on that site, actually. However, such undergrad (and free) pursuits are now behind us, because we now have BeautifulPeople.net (only supported by IE, annoyingly enough for Firefox devotees like me).

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To add to the discussion about what’s great about monogamy versus some of the other systems out there, my interest was peaked when I came across this article called “Let’s Chat About Cheating.” Author Steve Penner not only references the Sex and the City movie and TV series (one of the most accurate commentaries on relationships EVER), he gives his perspective on AshleyMadison.com, a “dating” site for people who are…um, married, and interested in having an affair(s).  In fact, one of their slogans is, “Life is short.  Have an affair.”

(His life’ll be short all right, when his wife sees that collar…) Continued

My roommate and I threw a party at our place on Saturday night. Party was a hit. We grilled homemade pizzas (have you ever done this?), which friggin rocked, and drank a bunch of booze. The popular drinks were mojitos and Vodka-tonics. Oh, I have to mention this. I found out the hard way that I’m allergic to apples by eating a Gala apple. I’ve eaten a million apples in my life and never had an allergic reaction, but this time I did. The reaction is that the inside of your mouth and throat swells up, and in fact my throat swolled up to the point I couldn’t swallow solids for like thirty minutes. I looked around on the ‘net for treatments for the apple allergy, but couldn’t find anything. So I pounded a Benadryl and a Claritan just to see if it would help. It didn’t, but the Benadryl did make me feel funny, and combined with the vodka-tonics I got drunk in like 3 seconds. It sucked.

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The BF has been overworked lately–lots of projects due, it’s his first year at the company so he’s everyone’s bitch, etc. He had recently apologized for this and vowed to spend the weekend relaxing with me, especially after he came home at 8:30 p.m. on Thursday and fell straight asleep (I had been walking the dog, usually his job, for several days). Unfortunately, it was not to be.

Friday he came home, again after 8 p.m., and fell asleep. He woke up much later and we walked the dog together, but by then it was after midnight and I was ready for bed (he’s an insomniac normally so with his nap he was wide awake). I was getting irritated because this was the second night in a row I’d been watching tv by myself downstairs (thanks to no friends in New City) while he slept, and then going to bed alone (no sex!) while he watched tv till the early hours.

Then he woke me up at 5:30 a.m. Saturday morning and asked me to take him to the Emergency Room. Continued

As Lance says here, the perfect date is indeed a blog-worthy subject. I’ve been on many first dates myself (in fact, that was practically all I used to go on) and while I have to agree with Dadshouse that most online daters aren’t terribly original when it comes to first dates, I thought I’d put in my two cents as part of my entry for his First-Date Contest.

I have to agree with Lance that what makes a first date stand out isn’t typically the venue, it’s something electrifying about the company that you’re with. However, it’s hard to be electrified if you don’t craft the scenario at least a little bit to your liking. The anticipation begins before the date. Obviously my best first date in theory was with the BF, since it led to our fantastic relationship. And there were good things and bad things about it–so here I’ll list the good things and the bad, thereby serving as an object lesson in what to do and what not to do, simultaneously. Continued

Okay, so I don’t know if there’s anything that can really be done about this, but a) I figure you all will let me know if you can think of something, and b) at least this way I get to vent. The BF has a friend that I’m not crazy about. We’ll call him Dick. We’ve hung out with Dick and his girlfriend, Jane, at their house a couple of times. We’ve also hung out with just Dick (significant, as I’ll mention later) publicly–restaurants, beer fests, that sort of thing. Dick is fun enough, though you can tell that he thinks a lot more of himself than any other reasonable person would. But he’s done/said some smarmy things that make me kinda uncomfortable. Continued

So I was reading on the LA Times Online about a new company called ScientificMatch that, for a mere $995 and a swab of your spit, will help you find your true love via genetic compatibility. The LA Times article talks a lot about smell–apparently, we are attracted to people who smell differently from us because they have different immune systems, and a child resulting from such a union has a greater chance at survival. Choosing a mate according to the criteria used by ScientificMatch means more sex, less cheating, and (for women at least) more orgasms. Continued