Beware the Fatty of Doom

I had this one amazing night over the weekend, probably the funnest night I’ve had all year. I’m going to write this one field report style, so it’ll be fast and furious with little embellishment. There’s some good tactics and a few new things I tried.

Flying Solo At Party Bar

I went to the local party bar solo. Ordered my first drink, gave some eye contact to a hot brunette who was ordering a drink next to me. She opened me by asking what kind of drink I was drinking. We bullshitted for a bit, bonded over the fact that we’re both originally from California but living in another state and it’s rare to find CA people here. She had to leave to go back to her friends. I could have definitely hooked her if I had gone physical (simply putting an arm around her would have done it), but I had just arrived and hadn’t warmed up yet. Very neutral mental state. I told her to come find me later and she said she would. This chick was a solid 9 and I was a little surprised that she opened me, but I’ve noticed that more women are doing this as I’ve developed my game. Basically, I’m projecting a cooler vibe and chicks can smell that. I think the better I get, the more this is going to happen, and my goal is to have chicks opening me all the time with me simply standing there.

Next set. There were two girls shooting pool at the back of the bar. One has a hottie with awesome knockers, the other was a huge chick. I opened by saying, “How much is pool?” I’ll call the hot girl Knockers and the other one Fatty of Doom, or FOD. When I say fatty, I mean two bills here. The floor was rumbling when she walked around. I BS’ed with them while they were playing 8-ball and was quickly hooked in. I didn’t run any notable routines, we just breezed about traveling, place of birth, high school shit, etc. I didn’t have my a-game at this point, but it didn’t matter. I was doing just enough to keep them interested.

After they finished their game, I got them to play a game of cutthroat. Continued to game up Knockers and everything was going great. I gave her some kino and she responded. Note here, I probably spent 52% of the time gaming FOD and 48% gaming Knockers. I was well calibrated and I knew if I ignored FOD even a little bit I would get blown out or cockblocked. Basically, I had to make sure both girls were having fun and getting plenty of attention. FOD was a genuinely cool chick too, very witty, so it was no problem.

As the game was winding down a playerish dude came over and opened us. He wanted to play partners 8ball. At first I thought I was going to have to tool this guy but he ended up being awesome. He said he wanted to play one game before his gf showed up. When he said that I was like, “Cool, I need a wingman.” He said no problem and we gave each other a guy-hug! It was like two players acknowledging each other. His name was Nir.

We played 8ball and I was partnered up with Knockers and Nir had FOD. The entire time Nir gamed up FOD and got her approval for me to mack on Knockers. It was awesome. This guy was rock solid. After the game, we did a round of shots, and Nir arranged to have Knockers make-out with me after the shot…I don’t know exactly what he said to her, but she agreed and we made out at the bar. Knockers was an incredible kisser BTW, it was like a revelation. She is far superior in this department to the last several girls I’ve made out with. I had a good buzz going and I could tell Knockers was getting drunk. FOD wasn’t drinking at all because she was the DD and I knew that was going to be an issue later. There is nothing worse than a sober FOD.

Eventually, two girls found Nir (both hot blondes, one was his gf) and he wandered off, but not before we guy-hugged again. He wished me luck. I have to tell you, Nir was great. He set me up perfectly. If I had a regular wing like this guy I’d be pulling girls every night.

I hit the dancefloor with the girls for a half hour. I’m a shitty dancer, but I’ve developed just enough dancefloor game to hang. Standard ass grinding and sandwiching. This got Knockers all worked up and we were all over each other physically, so I knew further escalation would be a breeze.

Working the Dive Bar

We bounced to a dive bar I had never been to before. On the way out of the first place, we passed Nir and one of the hot blondes. I gave Nir a player handshake and I hugged the blonde. As I was pulling away, I whispered to her that she smelled great and I shot her a fuckme look. She lit up at that and told me I smelled great also. I would have gamed her, but we were on our way out. Good tactic though, give the girl a hug, whisper that she smells good, pull away and give her the sex eyes. I’ll have to try that one more often.

This is where things got complicated. It was FOD’s idea to go to the dive bar, she was driving, and she knew everyone there. This totally crushed my social value and it also changed the group dynamic, because now FOD was in charge and she was leading the group. My attraction was taking a hit with Knockers and I knew I had some work to do. I was looking to pull Knockers back to my place, but I couldn’t figure out how to do that.

We went to the dive bar. It was a cool place and we had a blast there. I spent the whole time opening sets, socializing, and building back my social value, but also going back to my original girls and gaming them. I had to talk to everyone in the bar PLUS the two girls in order to maintain the attraction. If I had just leeched onto Knockers boyfriend-style the whole time I would have gotten blown out. She was a really attractive girl and I had established that I was a social guy, so I had to stay congruent with that, stay interested, but not overly interested. What a pain in the ass, right? I stabilized the attraction but still couldn’t work out the logistics. Closing time rolled around and everyone had to leave. We smoked cigs outside on the sidewalk with a bunch of people and got invited to an after-party. Let me say here, I don’t smoke unless I’m trashed or really partying. It doesn’t fit in with my athletic lifestyle.

The After-Party

We went to the after-party. This party was off the hook, there were tons of cool people partying their asses off, the music was great, and everyone was having a blast. It was a very cool crowd, an eclectic mix of bar types, artists and musicians. This was like five in the morning and the party was just picking up steam. Just to give you an example, at one point there were 20 people jammed into the little family room and playing “never ever have I ever” and most of them were strangers to one another. I loved it.

I socialized with pretty much everyone at the party. I was drunk as hell. It was majorly good times, but I was way more f’ed up than I needed to be. Being inebriated affected my game, and I’ll talk about that below…

I made out with Knockers probably half a dozen more times and we were all over each other. I had her sitting on my lap and we sucked face surrounded by tons of people. I still couldn’t figure out the logistics of getting her to my house. The big problem was the FOD, of course. They were bff’s and Knockers was crashing at FOD’s house that night. Knockers actually lived just outside of town, probably a 30′ drive, and FOD lived down the street from the party. To make matters worse, FOD was stone cold sober and giving us the watchful eye all night. Basically, she was telegraphing to me that I could make out with her drunk friend, but no way was I going to sleep with her. I knew if I lost favor with the FOD, she would slam down the iron cockblock on my ass and I’d lose everything.

At the end of the night the girls drove me home, which was nice. On the drive, I actually pulled Knockers into the backseat of the car and we groped for the last 10 minutes. My exact line was, “Come back here and hang out with me.” Let me tell you, she was an incredible kisser. Not all girls are created equal in this department. She was probably one of the best kissers I’ve EVER made out with. I invited them up to my place for drinks, but they declined. The sun was coming up.

I got Knocker’s phone number. I’ll try to game her up more and do a date but I really feel like this was a bit of a lost opportunity. It’s possible she won’t ever see me again because she views me as that player guy she met in the bar. Sometimes these things happen for a reason and it could be just another step along the path. We’ll see. As usual, I’m going to try to maintain the connection via text and phone.


  • Logistics are a bitch. I should have gone to sexual framing much earlier, started talking dirty to Knockers, and pulled her into the bathroom (or someplace) for a quickie. But, I was so busy opening sets and I didn’t get around to it.
  • Less drinking or don’t drink at all. Being drunk screws up your calibration and also inhibits your creativity, which is what you need most when dealing with logistics. Basically, it drops your game down to B level or worse. Plus, I was hungover the next day and I couldn’t get myself to go out two nights in row.
  • Don’t be afraid to go out by yourself. These are the kinds of adventures you can have.
  • evilwoobie

    I have a trick of pouring out some of my drink (hard) on ice water and calling the smaller glass my “chaser”. Then, I can choose when to be drunk (if I like the guy) and when to be sober (if i don’t like the guy).

    I like the sex-eyes reference. I’ve seen it several times and I either respond with a “you’re soo getting it” eyes or the “maybe-sometime-in-the-far-future-when-I’m-too-old-to snag hot cuties” look. 😀

    evilwoobies last blog post..Online Dating How To

  • dadshouse

    Love the field report. FOD is a nut buster. I find there’s always one like that in any bachelorette party my buddies and I meet- the denmother who won’t let anyone have too much fun. Sounds like you ran some great game. Follow up with Knockers and let us know what happens.

    dadshouses last blog post..A Creepy Writing Vibe

  • SheComesFirst

    Clearly you did not run into any bachelorette parties I’ve been to!

  • Brad

    I don’t think this is a lost opp…

    Just send her a playful text and let the good times roll.

    “I can’t believe you jumped me like that in the back of that car”… lol

    If she’s cool… you’ll likely be back in the saddle.

    Brads last blog post..My Number One Sex Trick For Lowering LMR