Okay, so let’s say you’re single and not quite ready for the hyper-competitive environments of the bar and club scene. There are plenty of alternative places you can go to practice your social skills and find dates.
Before I get to that list, I do want to say that the fastest way to increase your social skill is to hit the bars and clubs and mix it up there. Make as many approaches as you can and bank the experience. You’re going to get blown out, but suck it up because it’s part of the learning process. With that being said, I can totally understand if the club environment is intimidating and discourages you from making approaches.
Potential dates are everywhere and if you’re creative you can find good alternatives to the club scene. Use some of the methods below to supplement your social life. One big advantage to picking up chicks outside of the clubs is that generally they’re less defensive about being approached. If you’re a chick, obviously guys won’t mind if you approach and talk to them.
1. College alumni clubs: Did you go to a big college somewhere? If the answer is yes and you live in a sizable town, it’s likely that there is an alumni group in your city. Join it and attend the meetings. Meetings are usually casual affairs, like happy hour on Friday night. I went to the University of Florida and there’s basically a Gator Club in every big city in the country. Contact your alumni relations office to get info or just do a Google search. At my college, they even have a Gator Singles group that you can join. The big advantage is that you always have something to talk about.
2. Social/athletic clubs: Most decent size cities have tons of social or athletic leagues. Again, it’s a cinch to join and the meetings are usually affairs over cocktails and convo. See this site for an example in my hometown. An athletic club, say a co-ed soccer league, are mostly dudes and non-hotties, but these folks will often go out for drinks afterwards. Here’s a tip: use your new group as social proof to open complete strangers. Oh yeah, two other benefits are fitness and networking.
I recently joined a sports club in Orlando and the social circle I’ve adopted there has turned out be AWESOME. The folks are attractive, work hard, play hard, and know how to have fun. It’s been one of the best moves I’ve made this year.
3. Industry Night at the Bars: Industry nights are nights when the bars and clubs cater to people who work in bars and clubs. They run drink specials specifically for those folks. These are usually on Sunday through Tuesday, basically the off days for those businesses. Consult a local nightlife guide to get the downlow. Hit them, because industry workers are partiers and know how to socialize. If you’ve got a real job and make any sort of decent money, you have automatic social value because you have a “real” job.
4. Concerts: I love concerts because there are HIGH concentrations of hotass chicks, even more so than a good Saturday night at the club. I went to a White Stripes show on a Tuesday night last year and I couldn’t believe how many amazing women were walking around. It was mindblowing. The cooler the band, the hotter the women. Go outside where the smokers are and start chatting. Go to the bar and open the first set to your left. Even during the show you can open chicks standing around. Tip: Don’t forget to hit the bars after the concert as many of these people will go out for drinks.
5. Sporting Events: They call Wrigley Field the World’s Biggest Singles Bar because people meet and hook up after taking in a Cubs game. No joke. Again, wander around, get a beer, chat people up. Have a smoke on the breezeway and open sets. Try a pro football, basketball, or hockey game. A big college football game is a friggin’ poon convention. If you’re rooting for the home team, you’ll always have something to talk about. Go hit the bars afterwards and open people wearing team gear.
6. Host a Party: I could write a whole post about social circle game (and there are good articles out there), but throwing a party is one of the best ways to meet new people both during and before the party. Tip: A week or two before the party, hit the bars, make small talk with strangers, and invite them to your party.
7. The Mall: This is a good one for aspiring pimps who are under the age of 21. Most of the chicks at malls are teenagers but you can often find a high end mall near a big city that has loads of well dressed HB’s wandering around. The Westshore Mall in Tampa is a place I’ve been to recently that had some crazy choocha flouncing around. I swear to God, I think beautiful women grow out of the walls there.
8. Coffee Shops: Some people swear by day game at a coffee shop but honestly I’ve never seen high concentrations of chicks at the Starbucks in my town. Maybe I’m not looking at the right ones. Anyways, I do know plenty of folks who go there to use the wireless and surf the ‘net, so try it.
BONUS (post-edit): Just thought of this, and it’s a bit untested, but trying hitting up restaurants and fast fooderies near large work locations. For example, I went to a Chipotle yesterday across the street from a hospital and there were TONS of chicks (hot nurses), and some of them were eating alone. This requires a bit of skill and some speed, but could be a goldmine. Try opening with a simple, “Hey, how is your day?” or “What school did you go to?” as if she’s a bit familar.
Those are some good alternatives to bars and clubs. Basically, all you need is a place where large concentrations of people go and a bit of creativity. If you live in a walking city like NYC or Boston, you can also try meeting people just by walking down the street. Have any good alternative locations to meeting people? Leave in comments…