Archive for July, 2009

Success: Trappings v. Substance

Lance’s fantastic blog post about how accomplishment makes you more attractive really got me thinking.  I feel like what he says is relevant to the negative effect of the BF’s job on his health and decision-making, which has really got the BF and I revisiting a lot of things.

See, he went to grad school for a terminal degree in his field because he knew that he could become very wealthy working in private practice in that industry.  What he didn’t bank on was: Continued

Accomplish Something to Become More Attractive

Attending the 21 Convention on Sunday was a bit of a revelation for me in terms of how many young guys there are out there who need to work on a great many things; not just attractiveness to the opposite sex, which is probably the least of their concerns, but on every facet of their lives. As a group, this crowd was probably one of the least “attractive” groups of men I’ve stood shoulder-to-shoulder with in long time. Maybe ever. Don’t mistake this post as me hating on those guys…I”m not. Every person in social artistry knows it’s important to face your flaws with brutal honestly in order to improve. That’s why we publish our fuckups in field reports and why coaches will hammer you on what you’re doing wrong in-field.

Besides the usual suspects–hygiene, fashion, body language, articulation, and fitness–I thought there was one glaring quality that most of those guys really needed to work on. Here it is:

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Finding Our Center Again

My last post got so many comments that I thought it would be easier to address them in another post.  I want to say that I appreciate everyone’s concern and support – just don’t be offended that I’m not taking any of your advice.

Yes, the BF’s had a pretty shitty pattern of drinking lately.  Remember, last year his pattern was to not eat or drink, which is how he got his kidney stone.  Personally, I think that a kidney stone is a way worse health consequence than being hung over, and the fact that last week was almost one year to the day as the kidney stone just goes to show how specific his stress is to the summertime.  He hasn’t had any alcohol since, so we’re both monitoring the situation and going from there.

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Random Thoughts On A Pickup Convention

This weekend in Orlando was the 21 Convention, one of the larger pickup conventions in the country. This one featured four days of speakers and several nights worth of going out and bootcamping. Unfortunately, I was out-of-town on a trip for almost the whole thing, returned on Saturday night, and I at least made it down to the convention on Sunday. My hope was to be able to hear Jason Savage speak, who’s blog I discovered very recently and became a fan of. I missed his presentation, did at least meet him and a few others, and it’s my hope to be able to do interviews with him and a couple of the coaches. Stay tuned for that.

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Pick Your Path And Take It To The Max

Big props to my friend and fellow social artist Hammer, who turned me on to GoneSavage, a great blog on sex, dating, and pickup. It’s super edgy and the writing is easy to read and concise. In a nutshell, the guy traveled around the country in a van for a couple of years (homeless), had adventures, and picked up woman. He teaches now and is in fact speaking at the 21 Convention in Orlando this very weekend. I’ve been going back and reading some of his older posts and lay reports, something I never do on any blog. Continued

Drinking, Cheating, and Other Concerns

I am not in a very good place right now.  Every summer, the BF’s supervisor takes a month-long vacation (must be nice) leaving the BF all his normal work plus all his supervisor’s work for that month.  Even though summer is the slowest time in his office, then, he’s always stressed out and overworked.  He has yet to find a constructive way to deal with this.

Last year, it was kidney stones.  This year, it has been binge drinking.

And then Wednesday night I caught him embracing another woman.  Here’s how it went down (times are approximate): Continued